Protection of Women
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He must first talk with his wife and see if she changes her behav-ior
or not. This will take some time, and his anger will diminish over
this time. If the rebellious woman does not honor her hus-band and
doesn’t correct the way she behaves, the husband may desert
her in bed, before using another negative incentive.
Now let’s examine this situation. When these things happen,
usually the family and friends will know about it, and they will
try to recon-cile the couple (4:35). Hopefully, this will further
defuse the situa-tion.
As you can see, if a man who is an obedient believer goes through
all these steps, he will never beat his wife, simply because his
anger has diminished over time.
God is the One who has created us, and God knows the best way to
help a man to get ride of his anger, and He knows best how to protect
the women too. He knows that the passage of time helps us the most
when we are trying to suppress our anger. Note: one of the traits
of the believers is that they suppress their anger (3:134).
Once again we must understand that God did not mean to punish
the women by this verse. All He is doing is protecting the women
in a manner that gives the best possible result. And any abuse of
this verse incurs severe retribution.
God could overlook the matter and not even mention it, or He could
say in a straightforward manner that wife-beating is prohibited.
Why doesn’t He? The answer is God has created us, and He knows
better “WHAT” He created. He knew that if He just prohibited
it in a straightforward manner, people
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would simply not obey the prohibition
at all and the problem would continue to exist in the so-ciety.
God didn’t want that. God wanted an applicable law, with the
best possible result that could come out to protect the women, because
God meant to protect the women.
A valuable law must have applica-bility, and bring you closer
to the goal. A law that is not capable of being applied does not
have value. There would be no good in a law that can’t be
applied. The best ex-ample I can give is that of the communist system.
Communism did not look bad in theory, but it was not applicable.
Therefore, the system failed after a short while. And as a result,
not only the peo-ple did not get what they wanted, but their situation
worsened.
Another example is when men issued laws to give liberty to the
slaves. It was sudden, and caused a lot of mental and economic problems.
But when God wanted to give liberty to the slaves, He did it with
great wisdom and foresight. He decreed a suitable law that would
give the best result. God decreed, out of His wisdom, that the atonement
for certain sins shall be to free a slave. Thus, slaves were freed
gradually. They had a chance to learn a way to earn their living,
without being homeless or hungry. Thus, they could mingle in society
without having a serious problem or causing a serious problem.
Let’s go back to the subject again. We all know that beating
is bad behavior, and the Quran says “All bad behavior
is condemned by your Lord.” (17:38)
Considering this, how could God possibly give permission to a
hus-band beat his wife? How about the following verse:
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They commit a gross sin,
then say, “We found our parents do-ing this, and GOD has com-manded
us to do it.” Say, “GOD never advocates sin. Are you
say-ing about GOD what you do not know?” (7:28)
God explains in the Quran that it is the devil that advocates
evil, vice and unrighteousness. The devil does not want us to treat
each other amicably.
O you who believe, do not follow the steps of Satan.
Anyone who follows the steps of Satan should know that he advocates
evil and vice…. (24:21)
Tell My servants to treat each other in the best
possible man-ner, for the devil will always try to drive a wedge
among them. Surely, the devil is man’s most ardent enemy.
(17:53)
God gives men many different al-ternatives in verse 4:34 to prevent
this bad behavior. As Dr. Rashad Khalifa has explained in his footnote
for this verse in his translation of the Quran:
God prohibits wife-beating by using the best psychological
approach. If I don’t want you to shop at Market X, I will
ask you to shop at Market Y, then at Market Z, then, as a last resort,
at Market X. This will effec-tively stop you from shopping at Market
X, without insulting you. Similarly, God provides alternatives to
wife-beating; reasoning with her first, then employing certain nega-tive
incentives. Remember that the theme of this sura is defending the
women’s rights and countering the prevalent oppression of
women. Any interpretation of the verses of this sura must be in
favor of the women. This sura’s theme is “pro-tection
of women.”
May God bless us to understand the true meaning of His revela-tions,
always.
Laleh
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